Is this going to jinx it?

Remember the way you felt when your child was first born, and it seemed like the purest, most innocent, most guileless creature on earth? And everything you did pleased it and made it break out in those toothless beatific smiles? And it was ecstatic just to see your face? And a little smugly,  you thought you had created this perfect being and wondered what other parents did wrong that ruined their children and turned them into such awful wretches?

And then as your child got older, it got naughtier and less thrilled with your every move and always seemed to be wanting something more? And you began to feel as if you'd botched it, but you couldn't figure out how. And eventually, by the time it was in its teens, it hated everything about you and was embarrassed to be seen with you. And even though you now knew that this was normal development, it made you feel like a failure. How could you have started with a being so perfect and happy and ended up with one so difficult and miserable? What on earth had you done?

All of that happened to me—twice. But the little miracle that occurred with my son a few years ago is now taking place with my daughter. She is becoming a beautiful, pure, cheerful, confident person. She is reverting to the delicious goodness of her infancy. I'm gradually beginning to trust her again, feel less wary of unpredictable moods, less prone to the worst kind of wee-hour terrors. It's as if she's been reborn—and maybe this time I won't fuck it up.