Thursday, May 3, 2012

Anybody got a weenie?

Something’s not quite right in my dad’s tile-floored shower, so we got a guy out to look at it, and the guy said we should plug the drain with a “weenie” device, which he described as an inflatable stopper, and fill the shower floor with an inch of water and watch over the next 24 hours to see if the water level went down.

So I went to the hardware store and asked for a weenie. The first clerk I spoke with didn’t know what I was talking about. “Are you sure he said ‘weenie’?” she asked. Then she radioed another clerk: “I’ve got a lady here who wants a weenie.” That clerk didn’t know what a weenie was either. Soon there were about four employees discussing the weenie situation. By the time I left—without a weenie—I was beginning to suspect that the shower guy had set me up.

But when I told my dad the story, he reminded me that hardware stores are rife with sexual references. Many electrical and mechanical supplies have “mating” “male” and “female parts.

He said he went in to the same hardware store a while ago to ask for a stud finder, and the woman behind the counter quipped, “I’d like one of those too!”

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